Ask any parent, and the likely response would be it is a tough time to be a parent in today’s times. In this information age and with our kids having access to so many electronic media around, it can be daunting task for any parent to take stock of what’s happening in our child’s daily lives.
In our growing-up years, options of entertainment were fewer and life was much simpler, though not necessarily easier. We had to content ourselves with a much less digitized world, and look for simpler means to amuse ourselves.
So what are the fears that parents have to learn to face? I have tried listing down a few:
As parents, we have to accept that our kids will be attracted to the digital world and no measures of restrictions and parental controls can work in the long term. So how do we, as parents, ensure that our kids grow up into happy and responsible adults and good citizens? Here are a few simple tips, which I think would make a difference:
Like adults, children like to be loved, respected, and appreciated by their parents. In today’s connected and globalized world, it is inevitable that children are going to be influenced by external factors. Nevertheless, when they need help or are confused about some decision, they should feel free to approach us for advice, or for simply listening them out.
It is up to us, as parents, if we can mould ourselves to fill the emotional void in our children.
In our growing-up years, options of entertainment were fewer and life was much simpler, though not necessarily easier. We had to content ourselves with a much less digitized world, and look for simpler means to amuse ourselves.
So what are the fears that parents have to learn to face? I have tried listing down a few:
- Multiple influences on our child: For kids with working parents, external influences can be a major factor in our child’s development. It is fine if grandparents are there to take care, but if not, then we have to look at external support systems (crèche, play schools, or a home matron), each of which will have their own influences.
- Exposure to Internet: In today’s world, access to Internet is so easily available, what with so devices available including the PC, tablets, and mobile phones. No doubt the Internet is rich library of knowledge, but it is also an equally rich source of information about every possible vice.
- Lack of physical exercise: One look around in any Indian city, and you will not miss an obese child. Due to the digital world and school pressures, we find kids spending fewer time with outdoor activities.
As parents, we have to accept that our kids will be attracted to the digital world and no measures of restrictions and parental controls can work in the long term. So how do we, as parents, ensure that our kids grow up into happy and responsible adults and good citizens? Here are a few simple tips, which I think would make a difference:
- Communicate with your child: Kids first learn to communicate with their parents, before interacting with the external world. Keep this communication channel with your kids running even as they are growing. Spend time with them asking about their day, and assure them that you would always be there for them, and that they can share their deepest fears and thoughts with you.
- Avoid confrontation: One of the easiest ways of breaking communication with your child is through confrontation. As parents, we interact with our child (as a kid) mostly through “instructions” (“Come for food,” “Eat properly” or “Talk softly”). As our children enter the “teen” years, instructions can a source of irritation and embarrassment. Try to have talks the way you would have with any other adult. Start treating them as equals once they are in teen years.
- Share simple joys with your kids: It is fine to go for a car ride with your kid or eat at an expensive restaurant. At the same time, go for a leisurely walk or travel by public bus with your kid, or share a bhel or chana-garam with them. This will develop a balanced perspective in them, and they will learn to enjoy the simpler things in life as well.
- Travel with your kids: Ensure that you travel to a new place every year with your kids. This not only ensures family time, but also creates long-time memories to cherish.
- Think of new activities with your kids: For working parents, spending quality time with your child is more practical than the quantity of time you spend. To ensure quality time, you must think of new activities or experiences that you can have with your child. Travelling to a new place is one way of ensuring quality time, but can be done probably once or twice a year. For other times (for example, in the weekends), thinks of new experiences that you can have as a family. By no ways am I suggesting not visiting your favourite mall and your parents, but need not be done as a weekend ritual. Try avoiding weekend rituals; try different activities like a trip to the old city, a short drive out of the city, or maybe learn and play carrom at home.
Like adults, children like to be loved, respected, and appreciated by their parents. In today’s connected and globalized world, it is inevitable that children are going to be influenced by external factors. Nevertheless, when they need help or are confused about some decision, they should feel free to approach us for advice, or for simply listening them out.
It is up to us, as parents, if we can mould ourselves to fill the emotional void in our children.
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